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Wellness
Published Thursday Nov 21, 2019 by Sara Lesher

How I Learned to Love My Appearance By Ditching Negative Talk

Personal Growth
Motivation
Perspective

I have always been guilty of negative self-talk. I constantly make little comments about my physical appearance—the way my pants are fitting, the extra frizz in my hair today. The list goes on and on. I think this is something we’ve all been guilty of, maybe without even realizing it. 

I used to live in an apartment with three other girls, and I began to notice we were all continually putting ourselves down. I thought, I hate hearing my roommates speak negatively about their physical appearance, so why do I do the same? When our comments reached an all-time high, we decided we wanted to change.

 

So here’s what we did... 

We came up with a simple game. Each time one of us would speak negatively about her physical appearance, she would receive a tally under her name on a list. The person with the least amount of points at the end of three months would win a prize. Simple.

 
And here’s what we learned...

 

We used negative self-talk a lot more than we realized.

I knew I spoke badly about myself pretty often. We all did. That’s why we chose to do this experiment. But, I don’t think any of us realized how bad it truly was until we started seeing the “numbers” add up. Having a visual representation of our negativity was powerful, leading to an even greater desire for change. 

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We used negative self-talk a lot more than we realized.

I knew I spoke badly about myself pretty often. We all did. That’s why we chose to do this experiment. But, I don’t think any of us realized how bad it truly was until we started seeing the “numbers” add up. Having a visual representation of our negativity was powerful, leading to an even greater desire for change. 

Humor is a powerful substitute.

When we caught ourselves saying something negative, we’d laugh and replace it with something opposite. For example, if I were about to say my pants were too tight, I’d catch myself and say, “Wow, my ass is just too great for these jeans!” Our self-love sarcasm method not only helped us cut back on our tallies, but it also helped create a more positive feeling in our apartment. Rather than being upset over the way we looked, we’d find ourselves laughing hysterically at each other. Instead of individually putting ourselves down in the mirror, we all yelled compliments about ourselves across the apartment. It was actually fun.

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Humor is a powerful substitute.

When we caught ourselves saying something negative, we’d laugh and replace it with something opposite. For example, if I were about to say my pants were too tight, I’d catch myself and say, “Wow, my ass is just too great for these jeans!” Our self-love sarcasm method not only helped us cut back on our tallies, but it also helped create a more positive feeling in our apartment. Rather than being upset over the way we looked, we’d find ourselves laughing hysterically at each other. Instead of individually putting ourselves down in the mirror, we all yelled compliments about ourselves across the apartment. It was actually fun.

My words affect others.

My roommates and I didn’t realize how much our words affected one another. Our comparison skewed our visions of ourselves. On a night when I was feeling particularly unattractive and thought my roommate looked amazing, her negative self-talk only made me feel worse about myself and vice versa. By eliminating it altogether, I not only helped myself, but the people around me as well. 

3
My words affect others.

My roommates and I didn’t realize how much our words affected one another. Our comparison skewed our visions of ourselves. On a night when I was feeling particularly unattractive and thought my roommate looked amazing, her negative self-talk only made me feel worse about myself and vice versa. By eliminating it altogether, I not only helped myself, but the people around me as well. 

Our negative talk was just a bad habit.

By the end of the three months, we would naturally catch ourselves before making any self-hating comments, virtually eliminating them from our home. I realized when I didn’t hear my roommates hating on themselves, I automatically felt better about my own appearance. Before long, the humor was no longer a coping mechanism, but a powerful tool for self-love. Of course, we all have our days. However, my overall view of myself has improved a ton since then. Negative self-talk is just a habit, and breaking it can change your life.

4
Our negative talk was just a bad habit.

By the end of the three months, we would naturally catch ourselves before making any self-hating comments, virtually eliminating them from our home. I realized when I didn’t hear my roommates hating on themselves, I automatically felt better about my own appearance. Before long, the humor was no longer a coping mechanism, but a powerful tool for self-love. Of course, we all have our days. However, my overall view of myself has improved a ton since then. Negative self-talk is just a habit, and breaking it can change your life.

Sara Lesher About the Author Headshot
Written by
Sara Lesher
Marketing Content Associate
About the author
Spoiled by the San Diego sunshine, Sara’s hobbies include beaching, hiking, concert-going, and brewery-hopping. As MINDBODY’s Marketing Content Associate, she naturally loves reading and writing… so if you have any book recommendations, let her know. And just between us: she’s committed to health and wellness but loves a good taco (shoutout TJ Tacos in Escondido).
Holiday stockings hanging
Beauty
Published Friday Dec 06, 2019 by Paula Hoss

Under $25 Stocking Stuffers For the People on Your List

Skincare
Beauty
Expert Advice

It’s holiday gift-giving season, and if you’re like us, you’re starting to feel the pressure to find the perfect gift for everyone on your list. 
Sure, it’s tempting to take a single trip to Target to knock out your holiday shopping list. However, with this list of unbeatable products from some awesome small businesses, we’re making it easy to find gifts and Shop Small® this season.

NATIVE Body Wash in Candy Cane ($8 for 11.5 oz)
The perfect gift for: Your creature-of-habit Mom 

If your mom used to stuff your stocking with a year’s worth of personal care products, this delightfully scented and completely natural body wash is the perfect gift for her. This candy cane scented body wash boasts crisp peppermint and vanilla natural oils to leave you feeling refreshed and smelling delicious.  

 

Photo credit: @native on Instagram

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NATIVE Body Wash in Candy Cane ($8 for 11.5 oz)
The perfect gift for: Your creature-of-habit Mom 

If your mom used to stuff your stocking with a year’s worth of personal care products, this delightfully scented and completely natural body wash is the perfect gift for her. This candy cane scented body wash boasts crisp peppermint and vanilla natural oils to leave you feeling refreshed and smelling delicious.  

 

Photo credit: @native on Instagram

Creatively Intentional Soy Candle in Holiday Hearth ($21.99 for 16 oz) 
The perfect gift for: Your small-business-supporting Grandma  

Creatively Intentional is a top Etsy seller turned e-commerce powerhouse thanks to their constantly growing social following. Featuring handmade home and beauty products, they are not only plant-based, but also cruelty-free and made with therapeutic ingredients.

 

Photo credit: Creativelyintentional.com

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Creatively Intentional Soy Candle in Holiday Hearth ($21.99 for 16 oz) 
The perfect gift for: Your small-business-supporting Grandma  

Creatively Intentional is a top Etsy seller turned e-commerce powerhouse thanks to their constantly growing social following. Featuring handmade home and beauty products, they are not only plant-based, but also cruelty-free and made with therapeutic ingredients.

 

Photo credit: Creativelyintentional.com

Hero Cosmetics Mighty Patch Variety Pack ($13.99)  
The perfect gift for: Your skincare-loving little sister 

There’s nothing jolly about pimples, but with the Mighty Patch Variety Pack, those holiday breakouts won’t stand a chance. The pack features their Invisible+ patch to heal and conceal during the day, Surface for bigger breakouts, and Original for overnight treatments.

 

Photo credit: Herocosmetics.us

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Hero Cosmetics Mighty Patch Variety Pack ($13.99)  
The perfect gift for: Your skincare-loving little sister 

There’s nothing jolly about pimples, but with the Mighty Patch Variety Pack, those holiday breakouts won’t stand a chance. The pack features their Invisible+ patch to heal and conceal during the day, Surface for bigger breakouts, and Original for overnight treatments.

 

Photo credit: Herocosmetics.us

Versed Face Masks in “Look Alive,” “Photos Please,” and “Find Clarity” ($9.99 each for 1.5 oz) 
The perfect gift for: Your self-care-obsessed BFF 


These masks come in super trendy squeeze pouches and for a variety of skin types. My favorite is “Look Alive,” a clear gel mask with smoothing rosehip seed oil, hydrating aloe leaf juice, and a plant-based collagen alternative. “Look Alive” instantly moisturizes and smoothes the appearance of uneven skin tone. 

 

Photo credit: Versedskin.com

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Versed Face Masks in “Look Alive,” “Photos Please,” and “Find Clarity” ($9.99 each for 1.5 oz) 
The perfect gift for: Your self-care-obsessed BFF 


These masks come in super trendy squeeze pouches and for a variety of skin types. My favorite is “Look Alive,” a clear gel mask with smoothing rosehip seed oil, hydrating aloe leaf juice, and a plant-based collagen alternative. “Look Alive” instantly moisturizes and smoothes the appearance of uneven skin tone. 

 

Photo credit: Versedskin.com

CLN&DRTY Natural Skincare “Lavender Vanilla” Natural Deodorant ($16 for 2.2 oz)  
The perfect gift for: Your favorite fitness instructor 

With hundreds of 5-star reviews and an insanely loyal following, CLN&DRTY has taken over the natural skincare industry. Their natural deodorants feature arrowroot powder to absorb sweat and tea tree oil to kill odor-causing bacteria. Plus, they’re baking soda and aluminum-free.  
 

Photo credit: Clnanddrty.com

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CLN&DRTY Natural Skincare “Lavender Vanilla” Natural Deodorant ($16 for 2.2 oz)  
The perfect gift for: Your favorite fitness instructor 

With hundreds of 5-star reviews and an insanely loyal following, CLN&DRTY has taken over the natural skincare industry. Their natural deodorants feature arrowroot powder to absorb sweat and tea tree oil to kill odor-causing bacteria. Plus, they’re baking soda and aluminum-free.  
 

Photo credit: Clnanddrty.com

Simply Gum “Assorted Gum - Classics” ($15.99 for 6 packs)  
The perfect gift for: Your cubicle buddy 


Simply Gum’s variety pack features their top-selling favorites for mint lovers. Each pack of gum is made in New York with absolutely nothing artificial. (FYI, did you know most commercial gums actually have plastic in them?) Plus, every pack of gum comes with ultra-cute and convenient “post-chew” wraps for easy and clean disposal.

 

Photo credit: Simplygum.com

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Simply Gum “Assorted Gum - Classics” ($15.99 for 6 packs)  
The perfect gift for: Your cubicle buddy 


Simply Gum’s variety pack features their top-selling favorites for mint lovers. Each pack of gum is made in New York with absolutely nothing artificial. (FYI, did you know most commercial gums actually have plastic in them?) Plus, every pack of gum comes with ultra-cute and convenient “post-chew” wraps for easy and clean disposal.

 

Photo credit: Simplygum.com

Jade Leaf “Matcha Latte Infusions - GLOW” ($14.95 for 10 packets)  
The perfect gift for: Your health-nut Aunt  


Jade Leaf combines three health powerhouses, matcha, biotin, and collagen, into one easy-to-use drink mix. This gift set comes with 10 convenient single-serve sticks. Just blend, whisk, or shake with a dairy or non-dairy milk base for a satisfying, nutritious latte! 

 

Photo credit: Jadeleafmatcha.com

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Jade Leaf “Matcha Latte Infusions - GLOW” ($14.95 for 10 packets)  
The perfect gift for: Your health-nut Aunt  


Jade Leaf combines three health powerhouses, matcha, biotin, and collagen, into one easy-to-use drink mix. This gift set comes with 10 convenient single-serve sticks. Just blend, whisk, or shake with a dairy or non-dairy milk base for a satisfying, nutritious latte! 

 

Photo credit: Jadeleafmatcha.com

Copper Cow Coffee “Churro Latte” 5-pack ($17)  
The perfect gift for: Your coffee-loving dad 


This women-owned Vietnamese coffee brand is equal parts stylish and delicious. Guaranteed to create a buzz on Christmas morning, each single-use pour-over set is perfect for on-the-go and even comes with a decadent packet of condensed milk. It’s sure to be an afternoon pick-me-up favorite! A few other flavors include Lavender Latte, Rose, and Cardamom.

 

All the businesses in our gift guide have easy to use e-commerce platforms that make late-night shopping super easy. So, click on over, add to cart, and show a little love one of these businesses today.

 

Photo credit: Coppercowcoffee.com

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Copper Cow Coffee “Churro Latte” 5-pack ($17)  
The perfect gift for: Your coffee-loving dad 


This women-owned Vietnamese coffee brand is equal parts stylish and delicious. Guaranteed to create a buzz on Christmas morning, each single-use pour-over set is perfect for on-the-go and even comes with a decadent packet of condensed milk. It’s sure to be an afternoon pick-me-up favorite! A few other flavors include Lavender Latte, Rose, and Cardamom.

 

All the businesses in our gift guide have easy to use e-commerce platforms that make late-night shopping super easy. So, click on over, add to cart, and show a little love one of these businesses today.

 

Photo credit: Coppercowcoffee.com

Paula Hoss
Written by
Paula Hoss
Founder | CLN&DRTY Natural Skincare
About the author
The founder of CLN&DRTY Natural Skincare, Paula Hoss is a mental health and substance abuse recovery advocate. Featured in Beauty Independent and Brit + Co, she lives in Massachusetts with her husband, two children, and a flock of chickens.